Done-For-You Colonized Grow Kits

$97.00

⚠️ Hand made and grown in small batches in the USA — kits DO sell out. Order before they’re gone. Winter insulation included. *Sold for Microscopy research purposes only. ❄️

Born & Raised in the USA

Grown with love, shipped fresh

Super‑Sneaky, Super‑Fast

Discreet shipping on every order

60‑Day Happiness Guarantee

If you’re not thrilled, we’ll fix it

Real Human Help

Expert support from fun(gi) people

Our 3lb Pre-Colonized Grow Kit = 2+ oz of dried mushrooms (that’s over $400 in value 🤯).

We’ve already done the messy science part — so you get your first harvest in under 30 days. Just open the box, follow the simple steps, and boom: Happy mushrooms.

Compare that to the typical DIY kit: buy spores, play kitchen-scientist, and cross your fingers against a 50% failure rate. Then wait 70+ days for a tiny yield. Yikes.

With Happy Mushrooms, your bags show up already bursting with premium mycelium. That means faster, fuller harvests — and guaranteed results without the stress. ✨

Free Bonuses Worth $141 — Included with Every Kit

Step‑by‑Step Video Guide

$39 value - I walk you through the grow, start to harvest
Micro Workbook

$29 value - Track intentions, insights, and progress
Smart Guide to inner knowledge

$19 value - Gentle tips for safe, profound sessions
3 Months of Othership Meditation App

$54 value — breathwork & meditation on demand

$141 Value All included free — so you don’t just grow mushrooms, you grow your happy. 🍄✨

✨ The No-Stress, No-Mess Way to Grow Your Own Happy Mushrooms

Whether it’s your first time or your fifth, our fully colonized kits are designed to work — no syringes, no sterile labs, no guesswork.

✅ Pre-Colonized & Ready to Go — no syringes, no science degree required
✅ Set It & Forget It — zero daily misting or bag-cutting rituals
✅ Fast Harvests — fresh mushrooms in just 3 weeks (3x faster than DIY kits)
✅ Big Yields, Big Value — 2oz+ harvests = $400+ worth of mushrooms
✅ Premium Genetics — proven strains, not mystery spores
✅ So Simple — place it, wait, harvest… then smile 🍄

Why Our Grow Kit Works (When Others Fail)

Most grow kits fail because they rely on spore syringes, take months to grow, and require sterile setups.

Ours doesn’t. We’ve already done the hard part — so you can grow mushrooms in a matter of weeks, with no contamination risk and no stress.

DIY Spore Kits

❌ Requires syringes and injection

❌ Takes 65–70+ days

❌ 50%+ failure rate

❌ Needs misting and cutting

❌ Spores = inconsistent results

❌ No real support — everyone blames someone else

❌ You're on your own if it fails

✅ Arrives fully colonized

✅ Grows in ~21 days

✅ 98% success rate

✅ Grows sealed in the bag

✅ Liquid culture = cloned genetics

✅ 100% Guarantee — we own the process, so we make it right

✅ Real human support from mushroom experts

*With DIY kits, you get the blame game. With us, you get mushrooms — or your money back.*

🌟 Our 60-Day Happiness Guarantee 🌟

We want you to be over-the-moon with your Happy Mushrooms.

If your kit doesn’t fruit the way it should — or if you’re just not vibin’ with it — let us know within 60 days. We’ll either send you a fresh replacement or refund you.

All we need is a quick pic so our mushroom nerds can help figure out what went wrong (and so we can make it right). 🍄✨

What People Say About Us

Simple rookie proof product. If you leave it in the bag you won’t have any problems. Customer service team is quick to reply to any questions. Shipping is descret and prompt. From order to harvest expect 5ish weeks.

Brian Escott

At first I was skeptical, but then I was impressed. They grew well and yielded about 2oz. The effects where smooth. I’m buying again.

Dave

Bro! Where have you been my whole life. I just got my first ever flush and it wasn’t easy..it was stupid easy! I ordered 2 more. They ship it out immediately. Gracias from up north in Jax,FL!

Eric

**All Kits are sold for the purposes of microscopy research ONLY.

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Frequently Asked Questions

How long will it take to grow?

About 3 weeks from start to shrooms. 🌱🍄
Since your kit already comes pre-inoculated with thriving liquid mycelium, most of the work is done before it even gets to your door. You’ll often get your first flush ready to harvest around the 3-week mark.

That said, mushrooms are living things (not clockwork!), so exact timing can vary. Temperature, humidity, and your home environment all play a role — a little warmer or cooler, drier or more humid, and your grow may be a few days faster or slower.

What's the difference between the liquid mycelium you use and spores?

Think of spores as little lottery tickets — they might win, they might not. Spores are like seeds: random, messy, and they don’t guarantee the same results every time.

Our liquid mycelium is different. It’s like skipping the lottery and getting a guaranteed front-row ticket. We start with premium genetics that are already grown out and thriving in a sterile lab. That means your grow kit arrives with living mushroom culture that’s strong, consistent, and ready to take off.

The big win for you? Faster colonization, lower risk of contamination, and way more reliable harvests. 🌱✨

What yield can I expect?

On average, each kit produces about 2 ounces of dried mushrooms across multiple harvests (called “flushes”).

Keep in mind — mushrooms are living beings, so yields can vary. Factors like temperature, humidity, and airflow all play a role in how much your kit produces. Some customers get a little more, some a little less — but with the right care, you can expect consistent, happy harvests.

What if it doesn't work? Is there a guarantee?

Yep — we’ve got your back. 💛 Every kit is grown out with premium liquid mycelium in sterile lab conditions before it ships, so failures are rare. But mushrooms are living things, and sometimes nature throws a curveball.

If your kit doesn’t take off despite following our simple instructions, we’ll send you a free replacement. No stress, no hassle — just another shot at growing your happy. 🌱🍄

Do I need any special tools or experience to use this kit?

Nope! 🙌 That’s the beauty of it — we’ve done the hard part for you. Our kits come fully inoculated and ready to grow, so there’s no lab gear, syringes, or complicated steps involved.

All you need is a clean surface, a little patience, and you can grow mushrooms. 🌱🍄

Will it be ok in the cold?

Yes we’re adding extra insulation for winter shipping and offer 2 day UPS shipping. We’re absorbing some of the costs to make sure they arrive safely and our kits are guaranteed as always.

Questions? We are here to help!